Skip to content

Chaotic Wrestling “Cold Fury X” DVD Review

by on July 21, 2011

Chaotic Wrestling is a Massachusetts-based indie wrestling company that’s been around seemingly since the beginning of time. They’ve never had much of an online presence, but they had to have been doing something correctly since the company has chugged along all of this time. With that lack of internet presence, their crew isn’t exactly full of internet darlings. In fact, they’ve kind of gained a reputation among those of us who don’t follow the product as being a lot of guys who are either WWE-bound or wrestle that style since due to their affiliation with the late “Killer” Kowalski, who sent a bunch of guys to WWE and would often get his guys looked at.

I’ve never seen a Chaotic show in my life. That changes with this review. Cold Fury X was Chaotic’s big show of the year, taking place on February 11 of this year. If anything I say interests you in viewing the show, you can purchase it on the Smart Mark Video website (where they have this and many more Chaotic titles now on sale). Under the cut begins my in-depth review of the show!

JULIAN STARR & CHASE DEL MONTE  vs REPUBLIQUE (Fala & Kongo) vs THE LOGAN BROTHERS (Bryan & Matt)

 They do full-screen entrance video clips, much like the WWF No Mercy video game. The building they run is SO 1998; I absolutely expect Jimmy Deo to headline this show against Nikolai Volkoff. Republique are two large fellows (in the waistline sense) who I guess are doing a Nigerian Nightmares deal. The singlets kind of kill it for me though, unless they’re being domesticated by the guy in the suit and his policeman buddy. I guess Julian Starr won the tag belts with one of the Logans while the other one was injured and now that the other one’s back, there’s a beef since the Logans joined back up, leaving Starr alone.

The two smaller good guy teams (Starr/Del Monte and the Logans) go after the large island fellows from the bell ringing.  I was highly impressed by Starr/Del Monte and the Logans doing duel rope-running sequences in nearly-perfect sync after seeing SO many indie tag team matches where the guys try it and are completely off-pace from the other guys. Republique won me over by tagging in and out via headbutts. Julian Starr almost dies on a double-jump dive where he slipped and fell back into the ring, but Bryan Logan covers up quickly with a SICK tumbleweed onto the rest of the wrestlers. The Logans look a little generic, but they’d be really fun if Evolve gave their tag division a chance after its lackluster run thus far. Kongo of Republique went for a top rope splash and missed; I love the reaction that fat guy top rope moves get and it usually looks awesome, but it really looks awful when you can’t climb up all the way (he needed his partner’s help and could only get one foot up). Of course, Kongo immediately wins me back over by taking a bump over the top that no guy that size should be able to take. The Logans win the belts with a top rope splash/450 splash tidal wave-type double team move.  Fun little tag match where the Logans totally stood out as a darned good little flyer tag team.

I don’t know if it’s just my DVD player, but it made me go back to the menu between matches. This might get annoying.

Chaotic New England Title: MAX BAUER vs MIKAZE
They aired a recap prior matches between the two before the match, which is a nice touch to get new viewers up to date with why the matches are happening. If you’re wondering, this is the same Mikaze of mid-00’s Ring of Honor fame. He’s doing some sort of ninja meets Ninja Warrior gimmick now. Bauer is a big ol’ boy with long hair and a beard (I think he just got a tryout against Percy Watson at a WWE taping).

Because he’s a ninja, Mikaze does a lot of kick-based offense. The problem with that, at least in this match, he didn’t throw one kick that looked like it connected (cue Mikaze angrily e-mailing me, “DUDE! COME TO CHAOTIC AND I WILL KICK YOU IN THE LIVER FOR REAL SO YOU CAN SEE HOW REAL I AM!!!!”). Bauer kinda-sorta wrestles like a big guy, but because he’s so lanky and he tries more athletic stuff than the average big guy, he doesn’t quite have the presence you’d think (though I don’t blame him for not being a total giant-style wrestler since I’m sure if he signs, he’d be an average-sized guy in FCW and would have to reprogram himself if he spent his time on the indies wrestling like a giant). It was an okay match, but Mikaze’s offense took me out of it. The finish looked KILLER though (a wheelbarrow full nelson slam by Bauer).

The match was followed by Killer Kowalski being inducted into the Chaotic Hall of Fame, followed by a ten-bell salute. They also played a really nice video package with lots of old footage for Kowalski. I really dug it; it was appropriate and heart-felt, but they didn’t drag it on for a long time like most of those type of things on independent shows seem to go.

INTERGENDER GAUNTLET
 This was set to be their Intergender Champion Danny E. facing a gauntlet of female wrestlers (I guess he does the Andy Kaufman gimmick), but they announced before he bout that he had a legitimate death in his family, so they called out his girlfriend Alexis, who came out with the belt and announced she’d defend the belt.

The first match is Alexis versus Jennifer Cruz, who seems to be your average, everyday Hispanic lady. She came out to “Bad Romance”, which I would expect from someone slightly more…um…eccentric, I guess? Anyway, Cruz was out in a couple of minutes after a reverse DDT. It was very much every indie female match you’ve ever seen. It was some decent effort, but lots of sub-wrestling school-looking execution. Entrant #3 was Jamilla Craft of Shimmer and ROH Wrestling Academy fame. Same story, different names. This portion had a ton of bad forearms and general apathy from the crowd. Entrant #4 was Mercedes KV, who had some fire coming out of the entrance and was the best woman in this thing this far. She ate a running forearm from Alexis like apple pie. Mercedes wins with a top rope dropkick in easily the best wing of this match thus far. Nikki Roxx is the fifth entrant and I guess the story is that Roxx trained Mercedes. Roxx is working defacto heel here, as Mercedes is the underdog, young babyface. Roxx wins quickly when Mercedes kind of powerbombs herself off of a top rope hurricanrana. The final entrant is Mistress Belmont, who begins the match brawling with Belmont on the floor. Roxx wins with the Barbie Crusher (kind of like a sit-out tailbone bomb dealie-a-bob) to close it out. The final wing was okay, but other than Mercedes KV showing tons of fire and potential, it was not recommended viewing unless the average female B-level fare is your thing.

Ladder Match: HANDSOME JOHNNY vs BRIAN FURY (w/ Sean Gorman & Tony Omega)
Once again, I enjoyed the recap of their feud before the bout, including an angle where Fury attacked Johnny with a ladder to set up a LADDER MATCH. Rocket science, I know. For the record, Handsome Johnny might be my favorite wrestling name this week.

The stipulations are that there’s a briefcase above the ring with both five thousand dollars and Handsome Johnny’s Chaotic contract in it. If Johnny wins, he gets the five thousand dollars from manager Sean Gorman, but if Fury wins, Johnny must join Gorman’s Empire group. They booted Tony Omega (the gentleman in the police uniform from the opening tag match) out of ringside before the match since his job is to protect the briefcase, which was hanging above the ring.

Handsome Johnny won my heart by bringing back the Rick Steiner “grab the guy out of the air on a leapfrog and powerslam him” spot. Johnny takes some really great bumps as well (i.e.: his twisting faceplant off of a back elbow from Fury). I really dug this match as it wasn’t dudes falling off of ladders to look cool. These two had the same match they would in any other circumstance, only modifying it so that, instead of pinfalls or submissions, they’d go to climb the ladder. It was two guys trying to beat down the other guy enough to where they would have time to climb the ladder. Speaking of great bumps by Johnny, he took one through a ladder that looked more violent than when, in WWE ladder matches, guys fall from really high distances to go through ladders. I didn’t like him popping right back up to do a tope suicida, but hey, these guys aren’t perfect. Other than that one faux pas, they did a great job of selling anything involving the ladders really well, building up the ladder as a big weapon. I wasn’t a fan of the spot where Gorman tried climbing the ladder, especially since it didn’t lead to him being bumped and ultimately meaning something. It was randomly silly for a match that was pretty intense otherwise. For the finish, Fury decides that Johnny shouldn’t be the only guy who takes impressive bumps in this match and took a MAN-SIZED bump through a ladder bridge, leading to Johnny winning the match. I really, really dug this match. It probably isn’t the style of match that would get mass internet hype, but almost everything they did made sense, it was visually impressive with the bumping and Johnny bleeding and the crowd was into it. I’d deem this a huge success.

CLASSIC CHAOTIC COUNTDOWN
 This is Chaotic’s version of the Royal Rumble. The neat thing is that they’ve been around for long enough that they can do callbacks to their past with some of the entrants like WWE does occasionally with their Rumble. Former Chaotic wrestler Arch Kincaid is the official timekeeper and gets to do some schtick with the clock and shirtlessness before the match.

Rick Fuller (yes, THAT Rick Fuller) is on commentary, looking shockingly young judging by the shots of him on camera. Gino Martino (who I believe was on the Discovery Channel showing off how he can break bricks with his skull last year)is the first guy in this match, followed by Elia Markopoulos (who I’ve heard a fair bit of hype about from that area). Kid USA and “Dangerous” Donnie Rotten follow out to join Gino in a clique of men who look skeevy. Fuller ends up pulling the top rope down to help the good fellows eliminate Gino Martino, who had been cat-calling him throughout the bout. The one thing this match points out is that Chaotic is the complete opposite of most independents, where the majority of these guys are legitimate heavyweights. There’s some skinny kickpad kids, but a LOT of big dudes overall.

There was a long-haired dude in neon, long tights who I guess was doing an MMA fighter gimmick, judging by him having a cornerman and being nicknamed “MMA”. They would annoyingly cut to a tiny box in the corner of the screen whenever they needed to show Arch Kincaid. The problem is, they didn’t fill up the rest of the screen with the hardcam showing the match; it was just black. There were also some small fellows in random lucha masks and a guy in military fatigues who came out to the Magnum, P.I. theme song. Personally, I popped for DOCTOR REGINALD HERESY, who’s been around seemingly forever. Bobby Dempsey also randomly popped up in this (can Bobby Dempsey ever pop up anywhere non-randomly?). “Fabulous” Johnny Vegas might be my new favorite wrestler. He’s this scrawny old dude who wears a singlet with a bowtie and rubs his hands a lot while he gives other wrestlers this weird smile. It’s SO creepy that I love it.

The match ends up between Tommaso Ciampa and Demon Ortiz, who’s a thick, shorter dude with facepaint and a wacky necklace. Ciampa wins after a decent last few minutes of back-and-forth action. Overall, they put more effort into it booking-wise than most indie rumbles, but the issue seemed to be that there would be moments when they threw every idea they had at the wall and others where it’d just be a slew of random dudes running out with no rhyme or reason. It was super-entertaining at points, but dragged a lot.

Chaotic Heavyweight Title: BRIAN MILONAS vs ALEX ARION
Once again, they did a great job showing everything that a first-time viewer would need to see to get the story of the match before it began in the video package preceding the bout. I like the added production touch of having a camera operator follow both guys out of the curtain; it made the match feel a little more special than everything on the card. Arion worked some ROH shows in 2002; a short, fireplug-looking guy while Milonas is another large guy; bald with a long goatee.

This was pretty much a brawl, as they began the bout on the floor and stayed there for a while. Arion throws really nice running knee strikes. He also took a BRUTAL-looking powerbomb onto the edge of the announce table, not going through it. Milonas isn’t blowing me away, but Arion’s impressed me a lot. Out of all the guys on the show, he and Ciampa carry themselves the most like wrestlers, plus Arion’s a good work-from-under babyface. Milonas ends up going over with the double-handed choke bomb (which, between the recap and the finish of this match, they’ve done a good job of getting over as a finish just on this DVD alone).

****

Overall, it was a decent show. Alex Arion, the Logan Brothers and Handsome Johnny really stood out to me as the best guys on this crew. It’s definitely a different style than most of the major “smart mark” indies that get hyped online, so if you have a hard time adjusting to different styles of wrestling, this might not be the show for you. But, if you are looking for an alternative to what’s out there, I’d for sure recommend giving this show a shot. At its core, it’s a really simple show with none of the convoluted stuff that a lot of people complain about with modern wrestling. Some of the in-ring can be really rough at points, but I never got frustrated with the show and wanted to turn it off.

-TOM. 

Advertisements
2 Comments
  1. Handsome Johnny has always been someone to watch. I became a fan after seeing him on APW from Vermont. Dude has it.

  2. tom richards permalink

    hey tommy boy, u seemed to like this show more then i did. i liked the logan brothers, max bauer, mikaze, and not to much else, i kinda liked the ladder match, but handsome johnnys look is not very good. i thought the battle royal was the absolute shits. not the worst indy by any means, but nowhere near the level of most popular indys out there.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: