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’94 WWF BLOGJECT: 7/16/94

by on July 11, 2011

(Note: unfortunately, the disc for July 9th wouldn’t work in my laptop or either of my DVD players.)

THE FIRES OF HELL begin this episode of Superstars!

-I’m assuming this was the blow-off to the brief house show feud.
-Undertaker versus Undertaker for Summerslam was announced during the intro (which was played during Yokozuna’s entrance).
-Typhoon ran to the ring (yes, RAN), so Yokozuna cut him off under the bottom rope, leading to this high-larious visual:

-Yokozuna tried the Harley Race teeter-totter spot in the ropes and just fell down. It was incredible.
-A young fan chanted “USA” while holding up a Bret Hart figure. Jokes write themselves.

-There was an awkward spot where the announcers called that Crush was heading down to ringside, but there was not one cameraman to show us what was going down (yet EVERYONE was looking at him except for Typhoon). Crush ended up tripping Typhoon for the disqualification. Typhoon made a brief comeback before the numbers game was too much, as he was BELLY-TO BELLY SUPLEXED BY YOKOZUNA.

We go to Live Event News, promoting the August house shows in the New York market. I would be MAD if I went to a show with Bret versus Owen in an Ironman match for the belt and they came back with Bret and Razor Ramon against Owen and Jim Neidhart. On the plus side, they did promote a strap match, which was unusual for WWF house shows at the time.

Duke Drose did a sub-public service announcement for reading as he promoted his column in the WWF Magazine that month.

-Someone needs to bring back the mullet where the sides are dyed a different color than the top.

-Poor Barry Hardy took one of the most ridiculously stiff back elbows to the face that I’ve EVER seen. I also enjoyed Barry doing the phony “fall on my back and then roll backwards so that it looks like I landed on my head” bump off of Razor’s second rope side suplex.
-Razor goes over with the Razor’s Edge as Jim Ross screams about how Diesel couldn’t take that move.

-The best part of Summerslam? Todd Pettengill took off the King of the Ring shirt.
-They completely screw up the visual of the “Undertaker versus Undertaker” photo by putting one Undertaker in a shattered animated mirror.

-Pettengill also announces Bret versus Owen in a cage match and Bret gets to cut every Bret Hart promo in the history of the world.

-To tell you how interesting this match has been, it took me two minutes to come up with this: Jeff Jarrett had a GREAT dropkick.
-Jarrett wins with the Figure Four Leglock.

They played a Bob Backlund video package with this soft piano music that made it seem like Backlund had passed away.  They cut to a Backlund promo and…well, I thought Mr. Backlund was AWESOME during the mid-90’s run, but I absolutely wish they would have filmed the meeting where someone tried to convince Vince to push this guy as one of the top heels in the company.

The “BREEEEEEET!” “New Generation ad played. If you’ve never seen it…well, it’s hilarious. (I couldn’t find it on Youtube.)

HEADSHRINKERS (Samu & Fatu, w/ Capt. Lou Albano & Afa) vs NICK BARBERRI & MIKE BELL
-Bell took this INSANE-looking Nestea Plunge-style bump at the beginning of the match. Unfortunately, the camera didn’t catch it.
-Samu might have the most underrated and unheralded brainbuster in pro wrestling history. He also busted out Brad Armstrong’s fantastic second-rope 911 DDT.
-The ‘Shrinkers win with  a top rope splash from Fatu.

They aired the first vignette for Abe “Knuckleball” Schwartz. He imitidated the WWF fanbase with such lines as, “Ken Griffey, Jr.? He sucks!”. I enjoy how, despite the old-timey video effect and 1930’s-style baseball announcer voiceover, he’s training in a batting cage with a pitching machine.

Tatanka was the guest this week on the Heartbreak Hotel. Shawn starts the whole thing quite racistly by saying, “The following guest has held RESERVATIONS all over the place!”.  Tatanka accuses Lex Luger of selling out to Ted DiBiase, then they play a video where Jerry Lawler interviewed DiBiase, who claimed Luger has already been bought. I feel like this “sellout” storyline would have been more fitting for Rad Radford when he debuted, but this is wrestling, therefore it must be eight years behind the times.

This week’s guest ring announcer, who Jim Ross refers to as “a nice, little Irish lad”.

-The kid didn’t know who either guy was and couldn’t be bothered to raise his voice. It RULED.
-Plugg busted out the Samoan-style thrust kick in the corner, which is always a welcome move.
-Plugg wins insanely quickly with a top rope bodypress. The ring announcer was so unexcited that you couldn’t hear him over the music.

They aired a recap of the Undertaker sightings across the country. Car Crash Theatre at its finest.

-Volkoff got PYRO. Yes.

-Volkoff is old and slow, but is still kind of the offensive surprise of these shows so far. He’s busting out butterfly suplexes, crazy running bootscrape-style kicks and BRUTAL running knees.
-Volkoff wins with the Boston Crab.

They close the show by announcing the 1-2-3 Kid against Jeff Jarrett for next week. It should be a great match, but they’d been hyping it the whole show like one of the biggest matches in Superstars history. For real.

This show’s worth watching for Yokozuna having one of the best matches of Fred Ottman’s storied career. There have been FAR worse super heavyweight battles on this planet. Also, the Headshrinkers are always good for offensive fun and the Abe Schwartz vignette was straight-up 90’s cheese.


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