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WCW 1994 BLOGJECT: 3/5/94

by on April 11, 2011

TONIGHT! NEW ENTRANCE! RICKY STEAMBOAT & ARN ANDERSON & STEVE AUSTIN! EFFIMINATE PUNKS (with a femme accent) PRETTY WONDERFUL FACE THE COLE TWINS! HEARTTHROB TOM ZENK FACES OBNOXIOUS RON SIMMONS! 2 COLD SCORPIO, MARC BAGWELL, RICK RUDE, & JUNGLE JIM STEELE ALL IN ACTION! HOW DO YOU FIT THIS INTO 90 MINUTES?!?!?!

Here you see Tony, Bobby, & “Mean” Gene at their new set. These men could not be more disinterested in their exciting new surroundings. The Hulk Hogan hype began on this show, as Heenan & Okerlund griped back and forth about a scoop Okerlund had about him.

THE BOSS vs BIG BAD JOHN

-As you can see, John is big. And I’m sure he’s really bad. (Actually, I think he went on to be Diamond Dallas Page’s short-lived bodyguard Maxx Muscle.)
-John is built like a six foot, four inch tall dwarf on growth hormone.
-This dude bumps SO AWKWARDLY, like he has a sunburn on his back and wants to do nothing more than avoid falling down.
-Boss dumps the dude like a sack of crap on a side suplex.
-Boss goes over with the Bossman Slam (which, unless you spin with it, really did look like a lazy finisher).

The Boss is with Gene Okerlund at the fancy new interview set. It was every Bossman promo ever, only about Vader. Hard time, getting locked up, and so on.

2 COLD SCORPIO & MARCUS ALEXANDER BAGWELL vs RIP ROGERS & RON OAKES
-They conveniently cut away every time Bagwell tried dancing during the entrance.
-Besides the new set, they also had guys working in tag team matches switch which corners they stood in so it’d be easier to shoot.
-Bobby Heenan pulls an Al Snow and GOES NUTS when Oakes pulls Bagwell off of the mat without going for a pin.
-For as much (deserved) credit as Scorpio gets for his innovative high-flying, the guy had a really great bodypress. Crazy air, he got on it.
-Scorpio & Bagwell win when Scorpio hits Oakes with the 450.

They cut to this shot and, the way it was framed, I briefly thought Steve Keirn & Gene Okerlund were standing there with a headless man. Keirn has to be the single most unnatural blonde ever. Think about this: THAT guy was Skinner just a year prior. Anyway, he’s looking for a good man to wear the bowtie (his words, not mine).

TOM ZENK vs RON SIMMONS
-Tom Zenk’s “Money for Nothing” ripoff walkout song has to be top five pre-Jimmy Hart WCW entrance songs.
-I enjoy Ron Simmons busting out the early-90’s urban speak while dressing like an even-goofier-looking American Gladiator:

-Simmons wins the match, shockingly in under two minutes. You can tell Zenk wasn’t thrilled about having to be squashed since he kicked out RIGHT at three.
Gene Okerlund introduces a clip from Superbrawl, where Nick Bockwinkel and Ricky Steamboat announce that Steamboat gets the next World Title shot, regardless of the Superbrawl main event outcome. But, Colonel Parker interrupts and shows Gene Okerlund a contract that states that Steve Austin, as United States Champion, gets the first World Title shot, not Steamboat.

“Flyin'” BRIAN PILLMAN vs JOHN STEVENS

-John Stevens looks like a John Stevens.
-Heenan: “Things are getting HOT here in World Class!”. Someone drank himself right into the Sportatorium.
-A nothing-to-it squash that Pillman won. Stevens’ entire offensive onslaught consisted of chokes.

-Pillman cut a promo with Gene Okerlund after the match to promote his match with Steve Austin on Main Event the night after. He even tried a new, awful catchphrase: “It’s good to be a blonde, but bad to be you!”. It especially worked since Pillman had let his hair mostly go brown by this point.

“Jungle” JIM STEEL vs THE GAMBLER

-Heenan tried to make a joke about that sign, then Schiavone (of all people) jumped in and buried the kid.
-The Gambler jumps Steel by THROWING HIS CARDS INTO STEEL’S EYES.
-Steel, once again, wins in short order with the Steel Trap/Thesz Press. Only thing of note in this match is Schiavone comically claiming Steel had “great timing” after a horribly-timed clothesline.

Ricky Steamboat’s with Gene to cut the same promo about the title shot he did at Superbrawl, but Col. Parker interrupts him to throw his contract for Austin in Steamboat’s face.

THE COLE TWINS (Kent & Keith) vs PRETTY WONDERFUL (Paul Orndorff & Paul Roma)
-I love how one victory early in 1993 made it justifiable to advertise the Cole Twins (who had done nothing else since) in a TV main event.
-You can tell they didn’t have the Coles working many dates. They were kind of clueless on positioning and it seemed to take Roma FOREVER to explain spots to one of them.
– I wish I had more observations to note, but they worked the simplest match possible. Orndorff beats one of the Cole Twins with the piledriver. Um…want to laugh at some mullets?

Gene Okerlund’s with the Nasty Boys and it looks like Missy Hyatt’s now officially gone from WCW by this point. The whole point of the promos is that the Nasties kept the belts, but Cactus Jack and Maxx Payne hurt them badly at Superbrawl. Then, Gene shoots to a pre-taped Equalizer promo, hyping that his big brother with his “big feet and big head” is coming next week.

“Ravishing” RICK RUDE vs DAVE HART
-A woman tried breaking her child’s neck to get him on TV.

-Dave Hart looks like every 1950’s-set film’s wimpie bad guy. Judging by the fact that he was billed as being from Indianapolis, I’m guessing he was either trained by or just rode up with Seymour’s Rip Rogers.
-Rick Rude might’ve given this poor dude the single hardest forearm to the back EVER. You could hear it over the post-produced commentary.
-Rude wins in under a minute with a jumping Rude Awakening that looked BRUTAL.
-Bobby Heenan called Rick Rude “the NWA International Champion” on commentary, which I’m sure didn’t help with any litigation with the NWA at the time.

Rude goes over to the interview area with Gene Okerlund, talking up his feud with Sting. He also said Ric Flair’s afraid of him, but Okerlund never went back to it, so I’m assuming Rude went into business for himself there.

Gene Okerlund hypes that they’re showing an interview with Hulk Hogan (presumably from the set of “Thunder in Paradise”) next week, which I’m sure set the internet’s primitive form on fire in 1994.

RICKY “The Dragon” STEAMBOAT & ARN ANDERSON vs “Stunning” STEVE AUSTIN & Lord STEVEN REGAL
-Why did they always use Austin’s last name when referring to him, but only use “Stunning Steve” on his entrance graphic key?
-Weird spot during the opening where Steamboat brought Regal over to Anderson in a full nelson, but Anderson refused to take advantage of Regal’s arms being tied up.
-They’re either working a REALLY subtle “partners on different pages” story or Steamboat & Anderson aren’t paying attention to each other at all. Anderson just tagged Steamboat in and held Austin’s leg for him, but Steamboat chose to go for the arm instead.
-Ricky Steamboat just sold a running punch to the face like he’d been shot. Oh, to be young and in 1994…
-I wish the camera angle was good enough for a clear enough screencap, because Austin did this incredible “IT’S OVEEEEEEEEEEER!” pose towards Anderson in the corner while Steamboat was down to irritate Arn.
-HOT finish where Regal held onto Austin to try to block a sunset flip from Anderson, but Steamboat hit the top rope crossbody onto Austin and pinned him.

We finish the show with Col. Robert Parker, standing by with Okerlund. Parker claimed that Steve Austin would “end Ricky Steamboat’s days” next week. I think that’s a death threat.

Overall, an interesting show. Not a great one per se, but this was the first show with the robot set and they turned up the steam on teasing Hulk Hogan coming to WCW, announcing the big interview for next week with hype for the announcement all episode. Also, while they never did a Control Center or even showed the words “Spring Stampede” on screen, they did announce Ric Flair defending the World Title against Ricky Steamboat, so the wheels on that got spinning. Oh, and Jim Steel still sucked.

-TOM.
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  1. ’94 WCW BLOGJECT: 3/19/94 « Mike & Tom Present…

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